A Yankee has Landed in Texas

My brother and his wife were coming to visit.  Every corner of the house was cleaned and the house was nice and shiny!  Two more days and they’ll arrive!  The beautiful new sheets, bedspread and pillows were ready to be put on the bed.  But, wait!  There was one of those foam rubber mattresses on the bed.  It was about 6 inches thick.  The outside of the foam had a plastic cover sewn over it, kind of like a plastic tablecloth.  It had a binding around it and little tiny holes in it. It had been on the bed a while so I decided I would vacuum it.  No, wait, even better than that!  It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining bright and warm enough so I could wash it and let it dry outside!  I dragged the mattress outside of the house to the patio surrounding the pool.  There I hosed it down and washed it with a nice smelling detergent.   I left the mattress standing on it’s side in the blazing sun.  Later in the afternoon, I turned it around so the other side would dry really good.   In the evening, I took the mattress into the house and put it back on the bed.  It looked great and smelled great too!  What a nice sun dried, great smelling bed my guests would have to sleep in!  I was really proud of the room I had prepared for them!

The next morning, I made the bed and around noon, our guests arrived.  When bedtime came at 11:00 PM, we were all very tired but looking forward to a wonderful day the next day.  My brother and his wife headed off to bed.  They emerged from the bedroom shortly thereafter.  I was surprised to see both of them and I asked “What’s wrong?”.  My brother replied “Our bed is soaking wet!  When we first got in, it was fine, but after just a few minutes, both of us were feeling wet.  Our skin was wet and so were our pajamas.  I mentioned this to her (he pointed to his wife) and she said, ‘Well, maybe it’s a water bed’.  I explained to her that if you sleep in a water bed, you are not sleeping in water and you don’t get wet!”.  Laughter erupted from all of us and we went into the bedroom, removed the foam mattress and took it back out on the patio.  We wiped off the box spring mattress laid some blankets down and my guests went to bed happy! 

In my zeal to have the cleanest, best smelling mattress for them, I just didn’t stop to think that when you press down on foam any water within will rise to the top!  How awkward!